doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
