no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
