Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
