I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
