you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Randomize
