..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I wannas sexs uuuuu
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win