So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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