after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Can I color on your dick again?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
