i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize