Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
