Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize