Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize