You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
