hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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