I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
