Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
