i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
