omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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