I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize