Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize