So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
