Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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