Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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