idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Girls should come with a carfax report
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
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You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
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His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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