It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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