when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
