I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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