So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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