That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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