OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
