What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize