I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Text me some of your sweat
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
