just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
