Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
