Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
