i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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