Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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