We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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