I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
This can only be settled by a dance off.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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