Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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