I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
