Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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