His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
