I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
