Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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