she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize