I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
