Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.

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  (615): If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night. http://tfl.nu/85ri
  Replies (13) Good night (4304) Bad night (707)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20

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  (608): the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20 http://tfl.nu/n9vd
  Replies (48) Good night (1256) Bad night (6743)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.

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  (810): GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK. http://tfl.nu/7sxv
  Replies (9) Good night (6806) Bad night (1277)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.

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  (201): It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb. http://tfl.nu/thcm
  Replies (6) Good night (5522) Bad night (1059)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.

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  (425): Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun. http://tfl.nu/x8cc
  Replies (13) Good night (2723) Bad night (1083)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.

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  (608): Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night. http://tfl.nu/vd8i
  Replies (4) Good night (2654) Bad night (1283)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck

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  (915): Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck http://tfl.nu/avfi
  Replies (4) Good night (2944) Bad night (935)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.

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  (419): Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class. http://tfl.nu/zkx8
  Replies (5) Good night (1022) Bad night (2653)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  "Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.

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  (416): "Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general. http://tfl.nu/5855
  Replies (4) Good night (2036) Bad night (821)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.

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  (978): IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES. http://tfl.nu/cxji
  Replies (7) Good night (2494) Bad night (760)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.

  (678): View more from Georgia

  THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.

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  (770): you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why. (678): THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH. http://tfl.nu/cex4
  Replies (18) Good night (3143) Bad night (845)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.

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  (913): Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon. http://tfl.nu/apie
  Replies (7) Good night (654) Bad night (1100)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.

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  (603): Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it. http://tfl.nu/oyn2
  Replies (1) Good night (832) Bad night (432)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  Fair enough.

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  (860): If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face. (1-860): Fair enough. http://tfl.nu/elro
  Replies (0) Good night (772) Bad night (490)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.

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  (612): My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly. http://tfl.nu/orbs
  Replies (0) Good night (443) Bad night (296)

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