Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize