So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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